Reflecting

Three years ago today I moved from Kalamazoo to Ann Arbor. It's interesting to reflect back on how much things have changed in my life over such a short period of time. I’m really amazed at how much personal growth in my life has taken place. I would say the only area of my life that I wish I was taking better care of would be my physical health (not that I’m doing that poor of a job, but I think this has been the longest streak in my life where I haven’t been seriously committed to getting in shape). I decided to transfer to Michigan in large part because I felt that I could have stayed at WMU for my masters without having too much difficulty, but if I went to Michigan there would be a good chance that I would struggle to keep my head afloat.

Even though I told everyone that I wasn't sure if I could make it at Michigan, in my head I was pretty confident that I was going to do great. I envisioned getting all A’s my first semester, convincing a professor to let me join their research group, and basically just cruise right through my masters. I then went to my first few classes and realized that I was sadly mistaken. Probably within a month of that first semester I was quite convinced that I didn’t belong in grad school and was just hoping that I would be able to scrape by and get my degree. I was so fortunate to have gotten a position at Langley Research Center for the summer following my first semester because there I gained confidence that I was at least an average grad student. I then returned to Michigan for the fall semester ready to do much better, but unfortunately my grades were even worse than the first semester. I didn’t loose heart though because during this period I began working for the research group I now work for…it was only hourly but there was a chance for an assistantship if I did a good job. I guess I did good enough work turning wrenches because at the end of the fall semester I was offered the research assistantship (for those that don’t know that means I get paid to go to school).

Ever since that point I’ve done much better in all areas of academia. I even managed to get a 9.0 the following semester (yeah Michigan grad school is weird…it uses a 9 point scale instead of a 4 point scale). The one interesting thing about the grades is that ever since I got the assistantship I haven’t worried at all about grades, but I’ve been getting higher grades (this is really weird if you consider the fact that I miss a lot of class due to work related trips). Actually if I think about that I get a little depressed because I really worked hard to get those lower grades. I think one possibility for this is that during the first two semesters I really didn’t believe that I could make it…so instead of just working hard I was always wondering if I belonged. I actually think this maybe the biggest advantage to me coming to Michigan for grad school…if I had stayed at WMU I would always being wondering if my success (assuming I would have done well) was only the result of being at a smaller university (I mean no disrespect to WMU here…I love the school and received a fine education from them).

I doubted if I had made the right decision coming to Michigan for over a year, but now I know it was the right thing to do. I say that not only for the reasons listed above but also for numerous other reasons.